Have you ever had phone sex with your lover? Maybe you can try it to spice up your boring love life. When you’re out at a boring business holiday party and you are wishing you could be getting it on instead, check out what we did for some holiday inspiration.

One time, we were at the annual holiday party for my wife’s work. As usual I couldn’t eat anything because I can only eat gluten free. It’s social torture. My wife promised if I came with her, she’d call me from the bathroom and we could have phone sex on a free trial chat. Now most of us have had bathroom sex, but once we started out at a party on the phone, and up in the bedroom. We almost got caught, in the host’s bedroom, but my wife quickly faked an upset stomach and we made a quick exit.

Vrooom! My phone vibrated in my pocket, right on cue. I walked by the nachos and even though they were gluten free, I decided I’d rather take this call. I found the bathroom and locked myself inside. I got right to it and pulled up my skirt. She knows just how to make my engine purr. And I know how to make her kitty cat meow. Soaking wet and so willing, that’s how she makes me. We don’t even have to say much; I know she’s got her head buried in wet pussy. It’s the reason I married this woman; the fancy food and the good sex. But I’ll never tell her mother.

She walks by the door and knocks. That’s my cue that it’s time to go. On the way home, I get her off while I drive (safe drivers don’t come.) I already came hard in the bathroom of a posh hotel.